Dogs vs. Babies

I have come to a conclusion about dogs since I have lived the past week in a house full of them. (Six, in fact, with one of them being my own) They may very well be just as much work as babies. And dare I even say that they may be more? At least with babies you place them in diapers to collect the remains of their digestive and urinary tract. I am sooo ready to throw a diaper on these dogs. I have never in my whole life cleaned up so much poo and piddle. At least with babies they will one day be fully potty trained (although it may seem like forever when you are the one trying to train them.). These dogs are now teenagers (by dog year standards, of course) and still have massive potty confusion. (I caught one piddling on poor Jilly's hat last night.) And sleepless nights? Yeah, I get them too. There's not much difference between an inconsolable baby and an inconsolable dog. The yapping lasts all night until the wee hours of the morning. I have no idea what they think they need to bark about. (And why, oh why do they not lose their voice after countless hours of barking?) If my bladder beckons me to the bathroom in the middle of the night, I am sure to ever so quietly tip-toe. But somehow their supersonic ears hear me EVERY time. And the raucous of yappers begins all over again. I even tried earplugs last night. (No, I wouldn't do that with a baby.) Didn't work. I get a few hours of sleep here and there, but when I wake up the next day, I have that "newborn baby hangover" feeling. And every morning, without fail, I'm greeted by little puddles of urine that have crusted onto the floor (radiant heat has wonderful aromatic properties in relation to dog pee). So I wash, scrub and rinse. And they all stare at me. I swear I think I see them grinning...laughing on the inside while they pick their next target to lift their legs at. And the other wonderful thing about babies? They're not mobile yet. Which means they can't get into anything. And chew it up. And make little girls cry over stuffed animals that have been terrorized. Enough said there. But when they're all sleeping nice and cuddly on your lap....oooh, they are so sweet. And it's a good thing, because after last night I had thoughts of making them sleep outdoors. They are so very cute...but if I had to make a choice...I'd pick another baby, hands down.